Battle of Love and Freedom

I have a fairly dynamic life. Conditions changing every now and then. The beginning was of course out of my control, but since I took the steering wheel of my life I didn't just get stuck somewhere and started living happily ever after. I have a weird definition about happiness. That I'll talk about in the future maybe. But yeah, what always drove me was freedom. Freedom to chose a lifestyle, freedom to chose culture and tradition, freedom of thought, freedom of expression and of course freedom of action.

You see freedom is a really abstract word. What does it mean? Its funny, we hear about freedom all day whenever we open a news paper or turn on the TV. It became a very popular word. In the process the meaning of it got lost. These days freedom seems like a choice between "What they want you to do" and "What you want to do". I say its just a word to fuck with our head.

But no, it gotta have some meaning. I get tingling feeling that anything is possible when I hear this word. So you ask what I think about freedom? Well its pretty simple, its the action that gives you positive feelings. Gives you happiness. Something that balances your bad karma. Makes you breath a full lung and smile. That's my version of freedom.

"Oh I thought being able to do anything is freedom" you say. So is stabbing a person for money makes it an act of freedom? Or maybe killing innocent people cause someone needed to acquire a "certain" personal agenda? Just think how one would feel and what kind of regret will haunt him forever. Don't tell me some people don't feel anything. They do feel guilt, they'll always do. They are just fucking egoistic to admit it. Otherwise alcohol wouldn't be such a popular drink.

Anyways, so its safe to say that negative acts are not included in the acts of freedom. I do believe in sacrifice, but that sacrifice needs to be personal. That can not be in cost of someone else or something else. You have to sacrifice your own conditions to achieve your own freedom. If you want something, you have to go ahead and grab it. It will never come to you.

If something is worth fighting for then bring me a battle. If there is something worth dyeing for then bring me a war. But there is always a question of right and wrong. This is the toughest part. I'll go ahead and say that freedom is not for everyone. Not everyone is capable of deciding whats right and wrong. But if you think you know, then go ahead and stand up for your cause. After all what is a life without true purpose?

So, my point is that freedom is very important, and to get it, we do all sort of things. But in my case its always a tug of war between love and freedom. You cant really get both. There could be a nice balance but if you have more of one you always have less of the other. For example you want to go out to see the world and live a life of adventure, but you have a loving family who cares about you. You love your family but want to be free and see the world too. For some this only remains a dream. For others they live that life. When I say love I'm actually talking about attachment in general. Attachment to your loved one, to a job, to a place, to a country. The bigger the attachment the harder to break free. Don't get me wrong I'm not telling you attachment is a bad thing. It sometimes gives us reason to live so to speak. But some attachments come between our bigger purpose, our bigger wishes. Then that becomes the moment of truth. Its important to know what we want, cause in the end its our happiness that matters the most.